Damn!

I cant wait to be done and out of high school
I am so done with all of these lil so called crushes
I am so pissed that everyone is surprised that I am pretty much a virgin about anything that has to do with dating!
That hasn't been my choice, if it were my choice I wouldn't be so innocent.
It is such a fucking sensitive subject of mine and of course it comes up every fucking day!
I am so fed up with all of this shit!
Sometimes I feel that it was so much better when I was in a depression, not having to care about anything because honestly I really didn't give a flying fuck.
Sometimes I contemplate going back into that damn depression.
Lately I am going through mood swings like a bitch who is permanently PMSing.
My friends try to help, but that doesn't work all the time. Sometimes it is them that has got me in a mood without them even knowing.
I am just so lost and so confused...
I have this damn crush on a friend, but i don't know if it is because I like him, or just the fact that I would like to do shit with him.
And he doesn't make anything easy, HIs girlfriend pretty much bugs the shit out of me, and he is always foolin around.
How come I don't have anyone to fool around with, am I that ugly, or that bad of a person.
...
...
I have tried to ignore all of this. But it is impossible.
Damn this mind that doesn't stop, damn these thoughts that always whirl.